would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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