I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
