So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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