So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Randomize
