I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
