I didn't shave. On purpose
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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