There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
