Michael Bay diarrhea
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
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