He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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