i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
These tits shall not be calmed
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Randomize
