There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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