dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
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