ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
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Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
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