I wish i was in the wii world.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
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