eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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