would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
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