McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Randomize
