Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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