HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
Randomize
