She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
