Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
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