we have pet lesbian snakes
Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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