I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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