She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I have aggressive nipples.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize
