just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Randomize
