would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
