either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Randomize
