All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
