Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
