who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
