I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
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