what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
