Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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