Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
