yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize
