I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
She bit a glass in half.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
that is very illegal...i love you.
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