I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize