Do you still have your period?
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
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