Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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