It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
I'm both gender and math confused
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