I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
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