Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
