was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
wow bdsm is so cute
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
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