Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
