omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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