i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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