This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
