So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Randomize
