Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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