and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
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